When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
He told me they were just razor bumps!
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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