I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
