she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize