So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
