Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
