Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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