What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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