Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
