forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
