Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
