pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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