Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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