at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
