wat bout pragnant strippers??
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
