he wants to bone in the snuggie
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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