So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
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