why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
