i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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