Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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