just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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