Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
