You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Green mimosas i think yes
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize