Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
