I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Randomize
