Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
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