Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
