u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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