Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
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