yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
That reminds me...we need to get swords
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
FUCK WHALES
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