We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize