waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
