i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize