Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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