Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
