Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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