if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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