we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
