i always forget guys have bellybuttons
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
