The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
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