so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
