He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I'm experimenting with sincerity
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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