Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
