I hate your face
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
