Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
