i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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