I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize