i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
