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Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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