I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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