just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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