Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Randomize
