How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Semen is not good for contacts.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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